Right Relationship with Anger

I spend a lot of time encouraging my psychotherapy clients to express their anger. Not because I want a world full of angry people, but because nine times out of ten, people are repressing anger that would be healthier to express and have validated and affirmed.

When someone goes through trauma, their natural responses shut down in an effort to protect themselves from further harm.

The energy of self-protection must go somewhere, and if it is not expressed, the body holds onto it, creating stagnation in the flow of life force. To name and express anger in a context of safety and love is a way to get things moving and flowing again, so that vital energy can animate the body and help to heal past traumas and remove energy blocks.

In Jin Shin Jyutsu, as in other Eastern systems, anger is associated with the element of wood and the organ function energies of the gall bladder and liver (3rd Depth). These elements are essential to the body’s functioning, as they bind the soul to the body and carry life force into a manifested state.

Helping 6th Depth Source flows (umbilicus and diaphragm) can support healthy 3rd Depth flow, enabling the body to release anger and move into harmony. Anita Willoughby wrote a wonderful article about the 6th depth here. 6th Depth brings the unmanifested energy into the manifested body as the “Big Breath of Life.” 3rd Depth is the “receiver” of these Source energies, transforming them into “qi” (life force and activities). When Spirit and Body are connected, we feel a sense of Oneness that then allows us to open to the world rather than shut down.

Spiritual practices (prayer, meditation, chanting, etc.) are intended to increase this flow, but sometimes they are used to “bypass” life force. When religion tells us that our anger is bad, essentially it is telling us to close down our feelings of being alive, which ironically disconnects us from Spirit rather than connecting us.

To open to Spirit means to open to life. Jin Shin Jyutsu explains how and why this happens through 3rd and 6th Depths. There is no need to shut down our anger when it comes from a place of self-defense, but it does need to be expressed consciously rather than unconsciously in order to be truly healing.

Restoring the Bridge

In Jin Shin Jyutsu, the 6th depth (Source, Big Breath of life) enters the body through the 3rd depth (Key/Qi, Quintessence), which is located at the sacrum and pubic area. This “bridge” is how we get started with our earthly incarnation, and when our life is completed, there is another bridge from the 4th depth (at the heart area) back to the 6th depth.

If there is difficulty at birth, the 6th depth energies (umbilicus and diaphragm) can be affected, and we can have a hard time bridging into the body. I had a medical project at birth (clubfoot), which required about 3 years of intervention to repair, through a series of casts on my feet for the first 8 weeks of my life, then orthopedic shoes worn to continue to correct the alignment of my feet and ankles.

Although there are much more extreme medical projects that occur before, during, and after the birth process, this experience was enough to create a “gap” between my 6th depth and 3rd depths, on which I work every day.

When we sleep, we go back to the spirit world from which we originally came, and so waking up in the morning mirrors the birth process every single day. For me, waking up “re-triggers” the disconnection I must have experienced during the medical interventions of my infancy, which means that I feel extremely dissociated, dislocated, and uncomfortable when I wake up in the morning.

My morning routine has always been very regimented, but lately it’s taken a particular shape that helps reconnect me to Source in a way that is supportive of my entire day. I’m lucky enough to live 5 minutes from the ocean, so I either swim or walk on the beach first thing in the morning, after a few morning stretches.

Then I engage in spiritual practices that allow me to open my heart. This part is essential, because spirit and love are really the same thing, and it’s this energy that wants to come into and inhabit our bodies.

Next, I use a short inner child healing meditation to connect with and release that early trauma, which I can do fairly readily since I’ve been working on it so long. There are still tears as I let go of that old pain, but they are tears of reunion with Self, so they are happy, cleansing tears.

I may set some intentions for the day after that, but mostly I’m just off to my day at that point, feeling joyfully seated in the base of my body, where the 3rd depth resides.

Recently, I realize that although most people do not have to work quite so hard to arrive in their bodies every day, there is generally some kind of transition out of sleep that is needed to “anchor” waking consciousness. And because this transition mirrors the birth process itself, we are all being reborn in some shape or form each day (unless we are sleepwalking through the days, which is also a possibility).

As I work with people, I enjoy helping them with this incarnation process. Because it’s so difficult for me to restore the bridge from spirit into body each day, I have an acute appreciation for the pain of being born in general, which – let’s face it – is hard for everyone.

It’s helpful for me to “pay forward” the work that I do to have mini-rebirths every day, because otherwise they would seem way too laborious! And honestly, being in a body can be quite blissful when we are fully rooted in the 3rd depth energies, but many things can block our connection to Source, including internal and external stressors.

All I know to do in this life is keep connecting to Source, and then listening to see what Source wants me to do next. I don’t know any other way to live, so that’s the way I plan to form my days going forward!

Soul Mate to my Body

I was diagnosed with mono (Epstein-Barr virus) a few weeks ago, and it has been a difficult ride. Since Mary tells us that the body is a receptacle for energy, not the source of it, I always become very curious about the origins of disharmony in the body.

With this particular illness, there is swelling of the spleen and liver, which is potentially dangerous if you don’t rest enough. It’s a very “waistline-centric” experience, at least for me it has been, since I never got a sore throat or cough. And since Safety Energy Lock 14 lives at the waistline, I thought it might be helpful to revisit this SEL in depth.

Located at the base of the ribcage, “14” came into the universe meaning equilibrium, sustenance (Self-help book II, p. 38). It helps with moderation of our mind and can transform “my will” into “Thy will.” It’s used to support those with eating disorders and helps with all digestive projects. Both Spleen and Liver flows travel through the 14s.

For me, the Earth energy (associated with the Spleen) has never been fully balanced, and so my waistline has experienced disharmony in many ways. This illness, I feel, is an expression of that disharmony and an opportunity to heal it. I’ve worked extensively with Spleen flow and all flows related to lymphatic harmony, since mono directly affects the lymph glands and causes back-up in that system. Lymph is a very interesting substance connected to both 1st and 4th depths, since it contains white blood cells (1st depth) and water (4th depth) and is a part of our immune system (both depths).

I’ve also received two lymphatic drainage massages, which strangely opened my waistline in a huge way with loud gurgles happening in my gut during the treatment. The overwhelming flow of lymph afterwards was a bit intense, so I may just do it gently on my own from now on.

Nourishment is such an important part of Safety Energy Lock 14, and when there is an imbalance, we can either starve ourselves or indulge in unhealthy kinds of nourishment in order to connect with the Earth element outside of ourselves. This illness has helped me to become a “soul mate to my body,” a phrase I’m borrowing from Sister Dang Nghiem of Plum Village. She created a meditation called “Listening to Your Inner Child” that I’ve been using when I wake up in the middle of the night. In it, she says that she is learning to be a soul mate to her body through paying attention to and honoring its messages.

When we are able to nourish ourselves in this way, then there is less need for outside sustenance. It’s been a slow process, but I am understanding the relationship between my physical vessel and the spiritual energies that inhabit it and would like to be welcomed into it.

I’m reminded of the Hindu story of Krishna and Radha, our soul and our body, falling in love as they dance together in the moonlight and understand that they are aspects of each other. As I nourish my body, this dance is more and more graceful, and there is less distinction between the two aspects: my spiritual aspect can shine through my body as it was meant to do.

5-Finger-Holding Attitude Harmonizer

Aloha dear friends,

I have been sharing this meditation with coworkers, clients, and friends for a long time, but just now created a video that I could share more widely.

I hope you enjoy it – bringing attitudes to rest harmonizes the whole planet!

5-Finger-Holding Attitude Harmonizer

With love,

Sarah

Meditations on Captivity and Freedom

Today I had the pleasure of attending a webinar with Anita Willoughby called “From Head to Tail – the story of Harmonizing the spine and the back with Jin Shin Jyutsu.”

What captured me most about this class was that Anita spent much of the presentation on the breath, and specifically on harmonizing tension in the diaphragm.

This area has always been a troublesome one for me. Due to being born with deformed feet that were corrected during the first few years of my life, there is a great amount of holding in my diaphragm area (base of ribcage). I connected the two together after receiving a lot of healing work on my feet and noticing that the more relaxed my feet were, the more relaxed and open my breathing felt.

Openness of the breath allows life force to enter and enliven the body, and as Anita said, this life force is literally sunlight of the 7^th depth spiraling down into form, starting with the spine.

The breath allows the light into the body, as well as LIFE – they are one and the same.

As we practiced self-help, breathing deeply and allowing our jumper cables (hands) to support this deepening, many people reported feeling calm, positive, relaxed; I had an emotional release during this practice.

We were opening up to the light of the sun, which came in and healed us right there on the spot. A miracle!

Freedom is always a choice. The breath shuts down because of trauma, fear, imprisonment, oppression, confusion, and disconnection from others. It’s not possible to close your heart if your breath is deeply open and relaxed – it’s a state of grace, even if it’s very difficult to find sometimes.

Put one hand on your chest, and one hand between your ribs, at the base of the sternum. Wait 5-10 minutes, breathing softly into these hands and allowing your own healing energy to enter the body.

You will feel a deep sense of relaxation and freedom that is not possible when the diaphragm is locked up. It’s such a powerful change.

The desire to control life comes from traumatic experiences that overwhelm the organism so much that the body locks up in fear. The only way to release this fear and the corresponding need to control is to breathe deeply and feel the feelings associated with the trauma.

Deep breathing can bring up these feelings and allow them to release from the body. The result is increased freedom of body, mind, and spirit, and a surrendering to what IS.

Surrendering to what IS is freedom. The need to control is captivity, in any capacity.

Control is exhausting and drains the spirit. We don’t need to control everything, and we can’t even if we try.

Trusting is more pleasurable. There is an expansive feeling in the heart. Shutting down feels like you’re going to stop breathing and maybe pass out. Not fun.

As someone who constantly works with her diaphragm and goes into a freeze response very easily throughout the day, I can tell you that working on freedom of breath means everything to me.

To surrender to the flow of life is FUN, and as Mary Burmeister taught: BE THE FUN.